Give Chuck Schumer 1.2 Million Volts For Christmas
The Chuckster is in the news again. Not Charles Barkley, whom I like, but Chuck (U Farley) Schumer, the senior Senator from New York, who last weekend was on a plane spreading the holiday cheer.
Chuck has a special way of making people feel good when he travels by plane, especially if you’re just a lowly flight attendant. The story is that the Chuckster was on his cell phone with Senate Majority Leader Harry (Squeaky) Reid when a flight attendant told him to wrap it up for takeoff.
Chuck told the flight attendant that he was on the phone with Squeaky, and the flight attendant told him politely that it didn’t matter, all phones had to be off for takeoff. (This is a rule for everyone, but liberals always think that rules apply to everyone except themselves.) Chucky Boy then muttered something to the effect that the healthcare bill was just going to have to wait, (like this conversation between he and Squeaky was the straw that stirred the drink), and then called the flight attendant a “Bitch.”
Unfortunately for Chuck (U Farley), there were several Republican staffers within a few seats who heard the whole exchange. Even Chuckie Cheesez chief of staff admitted that what happened was true. You have to love these hypocrites like Chuck. They always stand foursquare with “the people.” Except of course, if you’re a “Bitch,” or anybody else who tries to make them follow the rules everybody else does.
If the Big Kahuna had been that flight attendant, (and my oh my… what a sight that would be) I would have asked politely one time, and then…and then…when Chuck continued his rap with Squeaky, I would have demurely applied Double Trouble and itz 1.2 million volts right below his ear. The gentle application would have continued until the Chuckster’s head was in the seat, with his feet over the seat in front of him, and his shoes flying toward the pilot’s door.
Now that…would have been something to see.
http://www.bigkahunasecurity.com/doubletroublestungun.htm
I would even have given him a couple of quarters, so he could call Patrick Kennedy, who also has problems with airline personnel.
Next time he should fly Air Pelosi.
Stay aware, alert, and have a plan.
Merry Christmas,
Aloha kaua,
Nui (Big) Kahuna
Yeah well when I was flying the redeye from LA to Boston, I sprayed piss all over my pants in the airplane bathroom.
I’d like to say it was because of turbulance, but it wasn’t. I just couldn’t “get free and clear” in time.
Since I didn’t even bother cleaning it up, the stink was something awful, and the imitation leather seats absorbed nothing. Everyone around hated me.
Sounds like you could use some Depends! Once I made the switch and realized I could read The New York Times without even visiting the toilet first, I was hooked!
Just make sure to change your pair every 3-5 days.
-Dr. Enell Pee PhD CPT